6:25 Squawkers and 6:35 Walkers

Hey, It’s Jet Here.

Yesterday, Mom and I began our morning constitutional about ten minutes later than usual.  Most days, we head out between 6:10/6:15 a.m.  Because I’m such a gentleman, I curl up on the couch and politely wait until Mom finishes her breakfast.  Jet, tell the truth, you bark your “I’m ready, what’s taking you so long” woof in combination with wagging and dancing the K9 jig about 2/3 through whatever I’m eating for breakfast.  Mom, I’m looking out for your portion control.  Jet… Yes, Mom.

Anyway, because of the recent time change, see Human Peeves, the birds in our area exercise earlier too.  Over the last few mornings, amazingly at the same time, a flock of birds cross our path diagonally from Southeast to Northwest and boy do they squawk.  They totally disturb my Scooby Doo Academy sniff detecting practice.

Mom thought they might be the noisy flock of parrots that escaped from Parrot Jungle and now hover in our general area.  In fact, the parrots used to distract my sister, Koko, when she and Mom did pet therapy at S. Miami Hospital.  However, Mom decided they are black, not green.  When the Ibis flock sails overhead, all you hear is swoosh, so, count them out.  It’s a bit of an ongoing mystery for us, Jet, student of Scooby Doo Academy and Mom, curious by nature.

So, I go back to detecting; head down, sniffing each blade of grass, hedge, palm tree and hark – I hear voices.  A pack of 2 female humans walking very fast pass us.  Mom and the ladies exchange morning greetings.  (Some days their pack has up to 4 ladies talking, talking, talking.)  One lady always tells Mom how afraid of dogs she is.  The crazy part – she owns a small barky bark dog named Herbie.  I’m Jet the gentleman, Mom, maybe I need a sign?

Another great day.

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Beagles: Snoopy, MAX and Buddy

Hey, It’s Jet Here.

When Mom attended Camp Truda, she acted in the play; You’re a Good Man Charlie Brown.  Her best camp friend, Sue, played Snoopy.  Mom thinks Snoopy had a lot to do with the popularity of Beagles.

All I know about Beagles I learned from that “darn Max” and Buddy.  Our whole pack avoids that “darn Max” as best we can.  In truth, it’s not his fault.  The human who walks him, says mean things about all of us in another language when she passes by and doesn’t scoop the poop either.

She called my Mom names and my sister Koko ugly.  Glad I never heard that personally, or, my protective nature might just have kicked in.  She’s called me terrible words too; however, as I’ve written before, a Gentleman does not repeat words like that.  I behave really well considering that “darn Max” barks, howls and charges at us.  Mom reminds me that Max probably has a more endearing side when he’s with other members of his family.  She always looks for the silver lining.

Just when my rating of Beagles hovered at hmm… like zero, I met Buddy the Beagle.  Our newer neighbors, Pat and Cindy, recently adopted Buddy the Beagle from the pound.  Now, Buddy does that Beagle baying stuff, but, he’s a friendly fellow.  We’ve walked with him a few times and he and I had lots to discuss.  I really appreciated having some “guy time” since the rest of my pack is female.  Pat tells Buddy and me manly man stuff about baseball since he’s really involved in building the new Marlins stadium.  And… I don’t have to explain or apologize for stopping frequently to empty my tank.  Buddy the Beagle understands that I need to let fellow K9s know Jet was here!

So here’s to you, Buddy the Beagle, for restoring my faith in your breed.  See ya on the block!

Another great day.

UN Negotiations – Send Me In!

Hey, It’s Jet Here.

Now that we’ve gotten to know each other a bit, I thought I should introduce you to the lower life forms I share my house with.  Jet, that’s not an acceptable way to speak about your feline brothers Puffy and Fluffy.  Mom, you should hear how Puffy talks about me.  He ALWAYS reminds me: Cats Rule, Dogs Drool.  Well, Jet, two wrongs do not make a right, I will speak with him about this.  Yes, Mom.

Anyway, as I was going to say before Mom had to get her two cents in.  (Jet…) Yeah, I know Mom.  When I joined the family, the top priority was to set the pecking order.  Koko, well, she immediately informed me that she had no interest in politics.  One down, two to go.  Upon meeting, Fluffy seemed like a decent guy, the only thing – he NEVER stops talking to Mom.  How much can one guy possibly have to say?  Then, I met Puffy.

Puffy held “Head Honcho” position prior to my arrival.  After surveying the whole house, the time came for a showdown.

Puffy: Dude, this is my turf.

Me:  There’s a new K9 in town.

Puffy:  Hiss.  Cats Rule, Dogs Drool – SEE MOM, TOLD YOU!

Me:  Woof, Woof – I’m bigger and louder.  Unlike my sister, I bark and chase and I’m not afraid to go under the bed.

Puffy: A superior feline such as myself can jump higher and outfox you  anytime.

Me: Big Woof.  I can block the door to the laundry room and you’ll never see your food bowl or litter box again.

Puffy: Who needs this job, I can spend my time much more wisely.

Me: Glad you see it my way.

From my perspective, Jet walked in the house, he looked and sniffed around, we introduced him properly (tush first) to Koko, then, Fluffy, then Puffy.  I knew Puffy had been the alpha, so, I anticipated a hiss or two.  They stared at each other for what felt like a few minutes and it was all over, Jet assumed the alpha post.  Oh, I should mention, that I told all four that I would accept nothing less than a harmonious house.  After three years, I recently made a mental note that Puffy and Jet concurrently rested on my bed with me. 

K9 Math

Hey, It’s Jet Here.

Guess what?  Scooby Doo Academy likes math and science as much as Mom and I do.  I’m doing my first K9 math/science class assignment about equations.  They asked for an example of an equation that I have experienced.  I discussed my options with Mom and then last night, the perfect situation presented itself.  Here’s what I will hand in:

         plus 

Plus, no rain, thunder or


EQUALS  Mom’s email is goofy again, so, we could not use her real red boots with moose on them.  Also, Mom spent lots of time toweling me off, so, no personal pics of my muddy paws.

Another great, splashy, muddy night!

Our Friend David

Hey, It’s Jet Here.

Yesterday, only Mom visited our friend David.  David and I became pals about two years ago, when he and our other Think Factory friend, Ritchie, hung around the Kitchen Table developing Mom’s Kitchen Counselor business.  David gave me lots of attention, shared carrots with me and told me manly man stuff.

He showed Mom how to take a picture of me and put it on her computer as this thing called the background or wallpaper, I do not remember which, so she can look at me whenever she wants.  In fact, the picture of me resting above is on her computer right now.

Mom told me that David did this thing called getting engaged recently.  Woof, Woof from me to you!  We cannot wait to meet Brenda, his fiancé, and Maggie, his special K-9.  I’ve seen Maggie’s picture, she’s so beautiful, could be a double ceremony….

David lent a K-9 book to Mom called Could You Love Me Like My Dog?  Mom read it while I cuddled beside her before work this morning.  Good book, little one-liners with lots of meaning, according to Mom referencing K-9s, like Maggie and ME…

Thanks for sharing David, I miss you, man.

Another great day.

On Being a Gentleman

Sure, Scooby Doo Academy gives classes to improve my detecting skills, but did you know they also encourage enrollment in etiquette classes?  Yup, I’m doing an Independent Study “On Being a Gentleman.”  I have to collect data to present and Mom graciously agreed to type my submission.  Here’s what I have so far.

  1. Mom places Mary Ann’s morning newspaper on her pillar so she doesn’t have to walk down the driveway each morning per my instructions.             
  2. When we go for a pack walk, I sit gentlemanly-like on Dixie’s and/or Neve’s front stoop.
  3. I play nicely with other K-9s (if they have good attitudes).
  4. I ask Mom to scoop the poop, to show we’re good neighbors.
  5. I sit down and stay quiet as Mom requests before scarfing down my meals.
  6. When Giovanni puts the window down in his car,  I carefully place my two front paws so as not to scratch anything so we can exchange manly man conversation.
  7. I offer either or both paws to humans who ask.  (I’m ambidextrous.)
  8. I do not pass “wind” like some K-9s (ahem, my sister, Koko, even though I would take her f_rting (see, too gentlemanly to write the word) any day if it meant she was still alive.)
  9. I help Mom clean the walls.  (See Spa Day)
  10. At the dog park, I’m friendly to all… Mom calls me the “Mayor”.
  11. I politely wish Patches a good night when passing her fence.  (See Patches).
  12. I wait for a human invitation to enter Dixie or Neve or Samson’s backyards.  
  13. I lift my left front paw gently to help Mom harness me up for my walks.
  14. I rarely snore, unlike some K-9s (like my sister, Koko, even though I would take her snoring any day if it meant she was still alive.)
  15. I help Mom clean the dishes in the dishwasher, particularly the thing she calls the George Forman fat tray.

Oh, I will have to politely (see another gentlemanly thing) request that Mom email this list to the academy; it’s longer than I expected.  I’m quite the gentleman if I don’t say so myself!  I should definitely earn the coveted “S” (Scooby Spectacular) for the first submission of my Independent Study!

Another great and gentlemanly day!

Mom’s a Telephone Hog

Hey, It’s Jet Here.

Yesterday, I mentioned Mom’s Do-hickie thing she uses sometimes when talking on the telephone.  Well, I forgot to mention, she’s a telephone hog!  She rarely lets ME speak to people on the phone.  Most of the time, I let it slide.  However, she really must learn to share, especially when certain people are on the line.

For example, I love Rachel’s Godmother, who we call Madrina.  I have a 6th sense when she’s on the phone.  At first, I politely yipp.  Usually, Mom keeps talking.  Naturally, I bark more seriously, to get my point across.  Next, I do my whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, sounds and if absolutely necessary, give it my deepest sustained combination “you’re not getting this are you?” bark.

If I’m lucky, Mom will put Madrina on speaker and I woof into the microphone and Madrina talks to me.  Oh, I’m a good listener, too.  I perk up my ears to ensure I hear every word.  Mostly, Mom takes me by the collar and does that distracting stuff.  Distracting stuff may include:

  • That Cesar Millan guy’s tch sound – like that’s going to change my mind.
  • Petting me – I let her get away with that for a while, why not?
  • Offering me a toy or chewy – does she really think I’m that easy? Ok, sometimes I am that easy.
  • Ignoring me – silly, silly Mom…

Tonight, I befuddled Mom.  While she spoke with Madrina, I practiced all methods listed above.  In the middle of her chat, she took a call from my human sister’s doctor.  I did not bark once during their conversation.  When Mom resumed her call with Madrina, I resumed above listed methods of communication.  Mom and Madrina wanted to know how I knew the difference.  Yes Jet, I really do want to know, I’m truly puzzled.  Mom, can’t give away all the trade secrets you know, K-9 code.

Another great day.